Good-byes

You don't say good-bye all at once
but in starts and spurts
joys and hurts mixed

over time

memories fade, then suddenly SNAP
into crisp, tangible moments you grab out of thin air
hold them, taste them, swish them in your mouth
salty, bitter, sweet

and let them go

making room for more to come
sometimes in waves that knock you off your feet
at other times a peripheral foggy sense of who she was,
how she's stamped indelibly on your life, your heart, your very identity 

you say good-bye again

and again and again.